Canine Autoimmune Hemolytic Anemia (AIHA & IMHA) - Thank You To All

May we thank everyone that have posted such beautiful, heartfiled messages of support and concern to us all here. To be honest we are so, so very pleased that we found this website on Saturday 8th of Novemeber, the feedback, advice and help we recieved was amazing, unfortunatley all the help we received, and infomation given was too late for us to act upon. As with this horrendous disease fetality can happen at any time, little did we know that only hours after joining and posting on this site that our beautiful baby Daisy would have died. The end cant have been very pleasant for her, Daisy tried to get up and move herself to be comfortable just before midnight on Sunday Morning but as her body and heart was soo terribly week she collapsed as soon as she stood up, she laid on her side and took 3 last deep breaths and went to sleep......the house phone rang and our hearts sank, i knew what who it was and what was to follow. I (Claire) maybe typing this but i'm finding this very hard to deal with, I dont want to talk about it to anyone apart from on here, i cant grieve and dont know how to let go. My home is so empty every morning when i go to work, I dont have Daisy to hug, kiss and love before i walk out of the door until my lunch time and she's not there whehn i get home....how do i get through this? My husband (Jason) however wants to talk about it , but i just cant handle it, i blank it out and walk away from the subject,when he begins to talk about her. My house is filled with boys, including male dogs hense the reason why i wanted a Springer Spaniel Bitch, Daisy was my first little girl, and she doted on me from the beginning right until the end of her life, she would follow me everywhere like a little lost sheep and wouldnt go anywhere without me. My heart has been shredded into peaces and theres such a massive whole in my life that i dont think will ever get replaced. Daisy lost her dad (Oscar) 2 years ago to another terrible disease where we had no choice but to have him put to sleep. Life is so crewl, the only thing that puts my mind to rest is that she is now with her dad and hopefully she is happy. Let's just hope we can keep Skye our 2 year old Spaniel happy, when Oscar died we got Skye to keep Daisy young and for companionship, love and friendship. If there were some kind of website we could all get together on and set up and to make other dog owners aware of this terrible, tragic disease I would be only too happy to contribute. It has surprised us just how common this disease really is since joining this site and it has to be the most upsetting, heartaching way to see any pet suffer. We will do anything in our power to help and assist with other owners that are suffering or have suffered from this horrible disease. The support from everyone we have received can never say how much we care and thank you all, what a wonderfull website to have become part of where we have experienced sorrows and the rejoyces of others. One last thing before i end my comment - Daisy will be re-united once again with us on Saturday 15th November, we had her cremated yesterday at the most wonderful place to us - her final resting place. Daisy was born in a place called Oakworth, West Yorkshire and only a few miles away from there her ashes are kept unitil she is at home and in peace with us and her dad's (Oscar) ashes. If you are in our area and wish to take your beloved pet to a crematorium then please take them to a wonderful lady by the name of Charlotte Greenwood, her website is: www.cravenpetcrematorium.co.uk Her crematorium in our opinion the most peacefull place you could ever visit and so personal. R.I.P Daisy 13/06/1999 - 09/11/2008 Love Mum, Dad, Daniel, Jake and Skye (your forever playmate & solemate) xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx

Claire & Jason Stebbens West Yorkshire (UK)

Claire, I know how difficult it is to talk right now about your loss perhaps Jason could post here as well so he can find comfort in his loss too? I know it is so hard to believe that you can get through the loss but it does get easier. I don't think the pain ever truly goes away but it becomes manageble. Joanne's website is the best one for informing people of this awful disease and all of us would have been lost without her hard work and tiredless efforts. http://www.cloudnet.com/~jdickson/ Also you can contribute to Morris Animal Foundation through Joanne's site to help fund research on this disease. Penny

Penny Lytle Creek Calif

Dear Claire -- Losing a beloved dog to this disease just shatters you. You either feel like you've been broken into little pieces, or you feel like you've crawled into a black hole. This disease you'd never heard of took your dear dog -- before you even knew much about what it was. The best thing is to know that your sweet girl is in a better place. And to take comfort treasuring the wonderful life you had together. I started a journal and wrote extensively of the end, the diagnosis of IMHA, the fight, and then the memories of our life with our dear Wiley. I didn't want to risk that I would forget those wonderful memories. I don't write as much, but it still provides comfort. I understand the difficulty of the different ways that people grieve. After the first fiew weeks, I was still taking it hard, but my husband seemed to be moving on. At the same time, I thought I wanted to get a new dog right away, and he wasn't ready. We just didn't seem to be on the same plane at all, and it was creating stress, on my part, between us. I ultimately realized that he was grieving, but in a different way, and I had to accept that. I realized that he was hurting far more than I realized; he just didn't express it the same way. My acceptance helped me handle my grieving and want to see him be the same way. I agree with you that this is a comforting place to share your sorrow. People here do understand, and so many whom we think would understand, don't, because they haven't been through the sudden loss we have to this strange disease. This is still a comforting place for me, and I know I can share with forum members and feel better. Please take care and please let the forum be a continuing source of comfort for you. As Penny said, Joanne has done so much to help so many people -- this forum, her website, and the Meisha's Hope Fund at the MAF.

Brenda VA

Claire, it is true that no two people will ever grieve the same. I really thought I would never get past coming home to the empty house and the mornings without walks, and still looking to see if her nighttime water bowl was filled. But, somehow after months of actual physical and emotional pain, those feelings are "softening". I still miss her terribly and the tears still come easily, but in a more bittersweet way. I definitely had more severe long-lasting outward grieving than my husband who would say, don't cry you are making Brandy sad looking at her mommy being sad. She is better now. I saw that as his way to overcome the wracking sobbing and pain even though he missed all the same things I did. Do consider the memory "shelf" and album or whatever way you have to find a place where you can share "her space". And please go to Joanne's website and grief/loss pages, they are immensely helpful. I gave most all of the "doggie" stuff away and now, again all my initial denial, we are probably going to rescue TWO great pyrenees in a few weeks. They will never replace my girl but at least we can provide a loving home to two special friends in need. I can finally see through the tears that Brandy would be proud too. MOST of all, know you and your family are in our thoughts and prayers. Hugs and prayers, sharon and angel Brandy

sharon pa

I feel so sorry for you losing your Daisy so quickly. It is just as bad to lose your dog slowly as happened to me. It took 5 - 6 weeks of a gradually dropping RBC count before I had to make the decision not to go on. I was faced with huge costs for a second blood transfusion and vets who had already decided my dog had no chance of recovery. It hurts just as much as you feel so helpless. All the meds had had no effect in stopping the PVC drop. You look at your best friend and know you can't save him. What really hurts is knowing that had I had unlimited funds there may have been a faint chance of saving my dog. I now have a new pupply and although it will never be the same and I will always grieve for my Scruffy it has helped me overcome the loss I still feel everyday.

Julie Australia

Hi Claire, just checking in to see how things are, you sounded so upset the other day but I know exactly how you were feeling. I was devestated beyond words when I lost my Holly and it was made worse by the fact that my husband is away working and I had to deal with it all on my own. For me the Springer will always be the dog of choice and just like Dasiy, Holly would follow me everywhere and I mean everywhere. The Amreicans have a lovely term for them, "velcro dogs" as they don't like to be too far away from their humans. I had some very black days just after Holly's passing and though I still have moments I am more at peace with what happened though I will never truly understand nor forget her. She touched my heart and was a faithful companion. I know that you will get through this and if ever you want to contact me to just reminisce about the nutty things Springers do then you have my e-mail address. Sending much love Keri xx

Keri Lynn Wales

So sorry for your loss. There are no words to help ease the pain but please know that we are thinking of you.

leslie ca

Thank you to all that have posted, your kind words mean so much to us both. Keri Lynn - thank you very much, hope you have my email too, i might just take you up on that offer :) xxxxx

Claire Stebbens leeds west yorkshire (uk)

I too know the loss you are feeling - especially losing Daisy so quickly. I lost my 22 month old Tiger Lily to this disease in 2006 within three days of diagnosis, now I'm going through it again with Billy who was diagnosed in May this year aged 2 and a half. I still struggle with our loss and we are trying to find strength daily for Billy, but it is hard and sites/forums like this with love and support are priceless. You mentioned about websites - I have been fortunate to find one in the UK run by CIMDA which I find very helpful, I could let you have the site address if you wanted it. I would like to get some form of fund-raising going in the UK to try to help with research. These diseases seem to be a more open subject in the US compared to the UK. Take one day at a time, and remember the good things, and smile when you think of Daisy, she is at peace now.

Steph Gloucester UK

Claire, yes I can see your e-mail address, am going to contact Steph for the UK run one and fundraising would be a fab idea. I am hoping to use my new puppy as a PAT dog, just couldn't live without a springer in the house! My hubbie has come home for leave this weekend and it is the first time that they have met and she adores him already. More info about this horrendous condition needs to be out there. xx Keri

Keri Lynn pembrokeshire

This thread was discussed between 11/11/2008 and 16/11/2008

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